Yesterday, while I was at Wal-Mart doing a little grocery shopping, I grabbed a cart on my way in like everyone else. I had only pushed it a few yards when I realized that this cart was going to irritate me, it was a menace to society and it had to be stopped! With every revolution of the wheels, the entire store resounded with the annoying "CLUNK, CLUNK!" And, it had one of those front wheels that every now and then would do a violent pirouette as we strolled along! I rounded the corner to the first aisle and I started thinking of ways to discreetly dump the thing. I didnt want to make a scene by walking it back to the front door and selecting another one from the row of ready carts. Plus its embarrasing enough just pushing this noisy thing around! Nobody was around, I thought, I’ll just act like I am going to look at something in this aisle, and then walk away leaving it on the side. Yeah good plan, as I congratulated myself internally. So I stood there pretending to look at the facial cleansers and then moved on, rounding the corner of the next aisle, and just kept on walking. Ha! Take that Wal-mart, I thought. Now I can get my shopping done without being a spectacle. I headed back to the door to get another cart. I congratulated myself again on a well thought and executed plan. I grabbed another cart from the ready row. Pushed it only five feet and realized that I had yet another rickety cart! Nooooo! Another clunking wheel, and lets just say that every time I needed to make a left turn, all I had to do was just give it a little shove and take my hands off the thing...amazing! The marketers have outdone themselves this time by ingeniously plotting to enhance our shopping experience by making the carts corner like they’re on rails! How annoying-and exhausting! Time to re-group and come up with another plan! I vow that this will not be the end. I must prevail for all victims of shopping cart sabatoge! I’ll be back!!!
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